Follow this link to see an eerie prediction of the future…
This morning I was cruising along Queen Street, well stuck in traffic, on my way to get my hair lopped off. The car still has the extra security and go faster stripes as pictured here and here (it lives on the top of our aerial). There were two lanes going straight ahead and one turning right, although the straight ahead lanes were reduced to just one real lane due to dozens of parked cars. Anywho, stuck behind a lorry the car behind me sneaks out and pulls up right alongside me, essentially trying to pass me as soon as the lorry moved on – what incredible cheek! I noticed the driver seemed to gesturing to me, probably to say “can I sneak in there please, I’m in a rush”. I lowered my window as we sat there waiting to accelerate off into the soon-to-be space ahead of us both and the guy said “Excuse me, can you tell me where you got your bumble bee from?”. I’ve just stopped laughing about it now!
Finally, after 13 (14 for some), the Premiership table finally looks right. Liverpool are playing at Sunderland (our game in hand) on Wednesday evening and, after we win that by two clear goals, and we will, the top four will look like this:
Played Goal Difference Points
1 Chelsea 14 26 37
2 Man Utd 13 8 27
3 Arsenal 13 12 26
4 Liverpool 13 7 25
That looks a lot better rather than Wigan and Tottenham being in the top four, the chase can finally start! I think the end of the season it will end Chelsea, Arsenal, Liverpool and Man Utd fourth. Bookmakers beware my accurate psychic prediction!
Forty-five minutes ago the streets were grey and dark. Then there was a tiny hint of snow. Now it’s like God is having a pillow fight (with Buddah and the rest of them) up above us. Take a look at this and these pictures to get a feel of it (who needs a window anymore?). I hope our car will be okay, we only just put yellow and black go faster stripes on it at the weekend and added a protection system…
A friend of mine, Samantha (take a bow), sent me a link to a very taxing game. The rumour is it’s an IQ test used by Japanese companies. The object is simple, get all people across the river. The test can now be taken here. The rules are as follows:
1. Only 2 people on the raft at a time.
2. The Father cannot stay with any of the Daughters without their Mother’s presence.
3. The Mother cannot stay with any of the Sons without their Father’s presence.
4. The Criminal (Striped shirt) cannot stay with any family member if the Policeman is not there.
5. Only the Father, the Mother and the Policeman know how to operate the raft.
To move the people click on them, too move the raft click on the pole on the opposite side of the river. Finally to start the puzzle, click on the big blue circle on the right of the site. I did it in just under 10 minutes.
If that really floated your boat and you want some more, you can do a free online IQ test here. FWIW I’ve done two (real) IQ tests in my life and got 138 and 155, making me eligible to join Mensa. Let’s see if alcohol has really killed off my brain cells in recent years, I post my online score soon… (BTW the title is 1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6 in Japanese)
UPDATED: My online lunchtime IQ score is 127. Not great but it’ll do. My end of test report gives us this piece of salesman psychology: “You’ve got a very experiential way of learning and a strong mathematical mind. You’re able to whittle even the most complex situation down to comprehensible component parts. In short, you have mastered the art and science of precision. That’s what makes you a Precision Processor.” Who has the time to best my score?
Despite what my timesheet says (I’m number six), I am not a number, I am a free man. Last week I started re-watching the classic series, The Prisoner, starring Patrick McGoohan. Today I learn that Sky and Granada are going to re-make it and bring us more episodes! In true Prisoner style I am sceptical to say the least. My first concern is that The Village will not be shot in Portmeirion, Wales. Next I hear that they will “take liberties with the original”. This goes from bad to worse. At least a good production company is behind it, oh no, it’s Sky, the people who brought us Mile High, Dream Team and countless documentaries too trashy even for (channel) five. With all this information, I think I can safely say I won’t be seeing you.
Yesterday morning I was walking into my office and I noticed there was a frost even on the discarded alcohol bottles on the grass near my office. The drunks clearly are of a better class here in Edinburgh as the discarded bottle in question was actually a decent red wine (somebody turned it over during the course of the day to see the label!). At 9pm I looked at my fancy wireless indoor-outdoor thermometer and noticed a strange symbol that looked like this – . It was -2°C outside at 9pm and it could only get colder. A few minutes ago (as I finally crawled out of my bed, I suffer from sticky mattress syndrome you see), it was an unbelievable -5°C outside. EXTRA: Despite excessive anti-freeze being used, as I drove to work the windscreen was refreezing as I was stuck in traffic. I could see impressive crystals reforming in front of my eyes, obscuring other vehicles from my vision.
Andy posted a comment on my last post saying that I’ve probably set some new form of vanity with the excessive pictures of me on one page and that got me thinking. It shouldn’t come as a shock to many people that I am quite egotistical. A recent Two and a Half Men had a line in it that captures this quite well:
Charlie: “Rose, do you think I’m a misogynist?”
Rose: “Oh Charlie yes! (Laughing) Why, did someone try to say you weren’t?”
Anyway, back to me. I think it’s very interesting that the English language regards it as polite if you try to put me (as in the person reading this) at the core of the sentence. If I am the subject of the verb (comes at the beginning of the sentence normally) then we use ‘I’, e.g. Dave and I are going out now. If I am the object of the verb we use ‘me’, e.g. Do you want to join me and Dave? Notice that the closest person each time to the verb (the doing word) is the first person, the speaker. I think that’s interesting anyway… If you want a giggle at the rules of grammar, have a look at these rules of grammar.